Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Teenager Repellent!

Maybe it's just me, but there's been a mass flagrant flouting of the rules against electronic devices at school, including cell phones. At one point this afternoon, I walked into the front office carrying two cell phones and one PSP. A veritable armload of contraband. Danielle confiscated the phones, but I got the PSP...

Do I need to preface this story with "one of my NO kids"? One of the ones who's been driving me insane. One I've thrown out at least once. The one I gave detention to yesterday and then he wrote on his form that he would be quiet if I could just be nice when I asked him to be quiet. I told him to bite me and he was thrilled because he was convinced that meant I would go to jail. Sorry, hon. And this is the no impulse control having kid who shouted across the room "Miss, why you have such small hoops?" We finally determined he really was asking about my earrings and not my boobs, although as rude and inappropriate as that might be at least it would make more sense than just shouting across the room about my lack of ghetto jewelry (although I had some pretty huge 80s hoop earrings when I was in HS).

So, today as always he just cannot restrain himself from shouting across the room while other kids are testing. I told him to be quiet about 1300 times and he asked if he could go sit on the porch. Yes, please. Go chill out. I popped my head out to check on him a few minutes later and rammed into him with the door and there he was, watching something on his PSP. Dumbass! He was smart enough to hand it over right away. But he kept saying that I didn't know the rules and he's allowed to use it when he's not in class. Um, no.

Towards the end of class he came up to me and asked me when I was going to give it back. I'm not. I'm turning it in to the office. He wasn't accepting that so he sat down in the desk closest to me and just pelted me with questions. I completely ignored him. And then I had a genius idea. I turned on the Grand Coulee Dam song. Loud. Very loud. The bell had rung and the next class was filing in. He somehow managed to make it through that song, but when the next one came on, he got up and stomped out of the room, spewing curses. Delightful. I was just pleased to have found an effective repellent.

Ryan's response: "Opera would probably chase them out faster." Too true, too true.


Oliver said...

Oh my GOD! I don't know how you do that? I really WOULD be in jail by now because my basement floor would be lined with the hides of those snotty little bastards!

Kate said...

Drugs? Laziness? And if I want to hit them, I think about how much I love my life. You know, the one that doesn't involve sharing a cell with my new girlfriend.