Monday, June 18, 2007

Wherein Ryan reminds me that Parmesan is an aged cheese

I went to see the psychiatrist last week as planned. Although the Wal-butrin I've been taking has helped, I'm still struggling. While I have good days, I would often cry for no reason or be filled with rage for very little if no reason. We talked about it the last two times I was there, but I kept asking if we could wait and she was agreeable to that. I've tried so many things in the past with varying results.

This one is an MAOI. You know, the one from the drug interactions warning. They're actually quite effective, but they fell out of favor with the advent of the SSRIs and such. They have less interactions, including wine and cheese. Yes, you read that right. I considered something which might have an interaction with wine (doable) and cheese. CHEESE. This might indicate the level of what I've been dealing with. Why else would I even begin to contemplate a life without cheddar?

Anyway, the new drug is EMSAM. According to the literature, there are no food indications for the lowest dosage. It's once you start ramping up (if necessary) that you have to cut out anything that has tyramine.

Turns out wine is okay. I'm less relieved by this than you might think. Yes, "aged cheese" is on there. It lists all kinds of processed and soft cheeses. I love me some soft cheeses. But life without cheddar? I went to Moo U. We have our own freaking creamery with all kinds of delicious cheeses, including chocolate cheese. No more chocolate cheese? I mean, seriously, those Behold the Power of Cheese commercials? They had me in mind.

Anyway, not to worry about this yet:
1. This is only if the lower dosage doesn't work
2. Wal-butrin works okay, so I could go back to it if necessary
3. (Fingers in ears) Lalalalalalalalala

So, this is all stuff I can deal with. The thing that scares me (other than yet another drug that doesn't work) is preparing to take it. I can deal with dietary restrictions--I've done it before. I was on lithium for over a year and I was almost obsessive about drinking 10-12 glasses of water, limiting salt, and eliminating alcohol. I can deal with fussing with a patch every day.


Before I start taking it, I have to "flush" my system. No, nothing involving Colon Blow or anything like that. Honestly, I would prefer that. Last week I ramped down from the dosage I was taking and now I have to not take any anti-depressants for two weeks. These last two weeks of summer school are going to be GREAT!

I'm terrified. Not that anything bad will happen. Ryan knows about this and watches me like a hawk. Especially in this case since he knows ahead of time that I might need some extra support. And summer school requires about 7 brain cells, so that shouldn't be a huge deal. And if the kids have to deal with an even more insane than normal me, well, they should have come to class and passed during the school year.

So, please keep me in your thoughts/prayers, harass me if you know me IRL, and tell me all kinds of delicious non-aged cheeses!


shoeaddict said...

I wish you luck and feel your pain. In the depression part, not the MAOIs because I take Zoloft. I'll pray for you. It's so difficult to find a medicine that actually works. I went through so many.

And what would I do without cheese?
But, if it works, you'll be better off.

Kate said...

Thanks so much! That really means a lot. And I really could live without cheese if I had to. It's surely not worth losing my life over!

Glad you've found something that works for you. It gives me hope.

Tim said...